My Wonderful Grandma

*I have been working on this post little by little since my Grandma's death.  I has proved to be a beautiful way to grieve an incredible woman!  I realize many who read this blog didn't know her, but if you read this post, you will get to know a bit about her. 

My Grandma F passed away last month. She was a wonderful Grandma.  I will remember her love of family history and heritage, her beautiful flower gardens, her Norwegian foods, her one cookie or dessert per person rule, and her ability to carry on long phone conversations. I think one time I talked to her on the phone for over two hours.

Grandma truly enjoyed her children, grand children and great grand children.  Even when she was so sleepy and weary she was a proud and thankful Great Grandma for my kids.  I am so glad that my children got to know her.  Growing up I spent a lot of time playing with my cousins at Grandma's house.  She was around joining in the mix, or making something in the kitchen.  I remember playing bus with her on the stairs and playing store with her in her pantry.  I also remember her teaching me a couple of card games.  Grandma was a great laugher.  She would throw her head back and laugh with her whole body.  She loved my dad's humor and he could usually get her to laugh.  

As I got older I spent more time just talking with Grandma.  She was so wise in so many areas.  After Brandon and I got married we would stay at the farm and stay up VERY late talking with Grandma and Grandpa.  I realized during those times what a great story teller Grandma was.  She could tell us story after story about her growing up years and about my mom and her siblings as they were growing up.  She actually took the time to write many of these stories down.  What a treasure they are. 

Grandma's health really went down hill in 2010.  She did have long periods of good health after that, but during the fall of 2010 things were hard.  She was in the hospital and had a hard time thinking clearly.  We had just gotten M's referral and I had lots of big fears concerning his health. One day she told a relative that she knew M would be fine because she watched two videos and he was sitting in them and looking very healthy. While she didn't see any actual videos, we did get two small videos right after that.  The videos showed some mobility and then a week after that we saw a photo of him sitting.  I will never forget her confidence and the way her prophecy came true.  She also worked so hard to get a blanket made for him by the time he came home.  

Grandma really struggled to thrive during her last years on earth. She has needed 24/7 care for a couple of years.  This has come at a HUGE sacrifice to my mom and her two sisters as they split up their time caring for her.  I rejoice for her as I write.  She is free from pain, free to move and dance and laugh and think clearly once again.  She is at the feet of Jesus. 

Her journey on earth may be over, but her legacy continues.

As a way to process Grandma's death and remember her I decided to go through all my photos of her. I realized quickly this was no small task.  It took me a long time to sort through years of photos.  These are some of my favorite pictures and memories of Grandma from the past several years. 

One summer all the girls got together at my Aunt Julie's cabin.  It was such fun girl time and Grandma was eager to join in the fun. 

I have written many times about how special my Christmas Eve memories are.  I am so thankful that I got to grow up with such special traditions.

Our family... at the time.  Many more have been added.

Enjoying Grandma's beautiful flowers! The shirt I am wearing says, "Roots."  It is a fitting shirt for this photo.

This one of my favorite pictures of my grandma.  You can see kindness and love in her face. 

Right after we moved near the Lake, Grandma and Grandpa and my dear cousin Kelly came for a visit.  We were still in the process of painting and cleaning, but that didn't stop them from coming.  They were so proud of Brandon.  It was so special to be able to host them after decades of staying in their home. 

So thankful they came for a visit.

A classic picture from my cousin Brian's wedding.  Grandma claims this was the first time that she and Grandpa danced!

So apparently M was really this small.

M really did enjoy them. 

Just look at Grandma in this one!

Bret and I were both blessed to have all our grandparents at our weddings. 

We took a three generation hand photo at the wedding. 

After T came home Grandma and Grandpa journeyed here a second and final time.  They were eager to meet T.  I think we wore them out. I have a funny Grandpa memory from their time here.We took them to a popcorn store.  They both enjoyed it, but Grandpa ate so many free samples my mom felt like she needed to make a significant purchase to offset his free snacking.

Grandma was willing to play football (inside) with M!

We watched the kids play and ate popcorn. 

For several years we were able to meet at the farm once each summer. The kids had so much fun playing and Grandma enjoyed it all. 

That smile...

She looks like the happiest one in this picture. 

All the Grands!

So much love!

Here is our last photo with Grandma and Grandpa together.  It is amazing how Grandma had her best health when Grandpa had his hardest.  She was able to help care for him in ways she would not have been able to do years before that.

A pretty incredible Grandma and Grandpa. 

As I mentioned above, Grandma's final years were rocky.  She had a very rough patch but then rebounded for several months.  I chose to omit some of the rougher photos and focus on the healthy ones.  These photos were taken right before Thanksgiving 2015.  Grandma was doing SO WELL on this visit.  She actually led the way upstairs to show us the newly refinished wood floors. 

M was so proud to show her that he learned how to make stars. 

Smiles with M!

Smiles with T. 

Grandma and her girls Summer 2016.  I LOVE this photo!

Summer 2016.

T loved to tell Grandma stories and Grandma was eager to listen. 

My last time spending time with Grandma was after Thanksgiving this year. I am so thankful that we had such a good visit with Grandma. Both kids sang some of their Christmas program songs for her. As you can see from the photo below, Brandon recorded all of it.  Yay!

Grandma continued to enjoy her Great Grandchildren. 

A bit of a silly 4 generation photo, but I am thankful for it. 

Our final photo with Grandma. 

Mom and I were talking a lot in those final days.  We knew the end would be coming soon.  Grieving was happening while she was living.  I was picking up some take-out when the call came that Grandma had died.  It was a feeling of bittersweetness.  Sadness for all of us who would never see her on earth again, but sweetness for her and her freedom from the burdens of earth.

In the days following her death we made plans to attend her funeral.  Her funeral was on the Saturday of a very busy weekend for us.  With lots of prayer and conversation we decided to drive directly to the church for the funeral and then turn around and drive home on the same day.  Ten hours of driving in one day.

The night before the funeral we had a monthly potluck at our house.  We had 35 people over and some stayed quite late.  It was a very fun and special night.  I am thankful we didn't have to cancel.  M left with one of the families and stayed overnight.  He spent Saturday with them.  He isn't a fan of long car rides and we decided T would enjoy the journey more than M.

T, Brandon and I got up early the next morning and were on the road before 5:00.  We had great driving and made great time.  T did great with snacks and movies and of course no more sleep.  Brandon got sermon work done and I drove and managed to stay awake quite well.

 The funeral was such a lovely memorial to a lovely woman.  I am so thankful I was able to go.  I, and my brother and 4 cousins were given the honor of being pallbearers. This is a role I have never done before.  I am so grateful we were allowed to do this.  My grandma attended a country church with a cemetery attached.  After the service we brought casket to the hearse and the hearse drove the casket to the cemetery.  My cousins and I had to carry the casket quite a distance from the hearse to the burial plot, through the snow and slush.  It was a little wild.  We recruited a bit of extra help because it was slippery and we didn't want to drop Grandma.  I was so deeply moved by the tenderness and care we had for our last moments with Grandma's earthly body.  As Grandma's health went down hill my mom and I talked so much about the circle of life and how the care for those near death is similar to those at the beginning of life. In those last moments with Grandma's body I couldn't help but thinking of her first moments of life.  The first moments her earthly body was held I am sure much care was taken to make sure she wasn't dropped as well.  I also thought of the first moments she tenderly held each of her grandchildren.  It was such a holy moment.  One I will treasure all the days of my life.

After the funeral we were able to take time to eat and talk with friends and family.  It was nice to not feel rushed. We were some of the last people to leave.  Our drive home was quite uneventful and we got home shortly before bedtime.  I went to pick up M and learned he had a good day with friends.

One of the reasons we didn't stay after the funeral was our big Sunday the following day.  We had two special annual celebration services and Sunday School in between.  Since Brandon and I were both teaching and the services were so special, it would have been hard to miss them.  We also had the first night of Foundations (our new to the church/membership class), so it was a very full day.

In the days following the funeral my mom asked me what things I wanted to Grandma's.  I came up with some things that were more special and some that were more common.  I really wanted her every day Corelle dishes.  I was able to get them when my parents came a few days later for T's Birthday.  I am SO THANKFUL that I requested such a practical gift.  I use them every single day, and think of my grandparents each time I use them.  It might sound crazy, but I feel like I am a calmer and more caring mom when I see those dishes and think of my family.  I am glad that I chose something practical and I truly encourage everyone to get practical keepsakes from those they love.  Her dishes have been a healing presence to me.

Thank you for taking some time to honor my Grandma's life with me.   Grandmas are incredible.